Life was meant to be lived “Guilt Free”. Right?
Then why is it we make excuses? Excuses that aren’t true.
For example, I was on the phone this morning with my Mom. I had promised a friend I would be available to talk at a particular time. So sure enough the call came in and instead of just saying Mom I gotta go call you back in a bit (which she knows may or may not happen, and yet another thing to struggle not feeling guilty about) I made an excuse…(something like the Dr. is on the other line, guess the “Dr.” call was more credible than “yo my peep on line 2 and I gotta roll” ) anyway what’s up with that? Well, best I can figure is I just want the world to live “Happily Ever After” I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Sound familiar? Yep there’s a great excuse for my dishonesty and ego, really Ronda, what would have happened if you spoke your truth? Hummmm let me think, maybe just maybe my Mom would have been grateful to hang up because she does have a life after all or maybe she would be upset. The reality is I’m not a mind reader so how the heck do I know what she’s going to think and really what is my not being honest going to change.
The point is learning to be truthful is an art. It is an act of discipline and it is about what you believe and why you believe it. It’s about what I tell myself and how it matters ( some topics for another day). The awareness is there what I do with it is up to me. I can avoid it as it continues to separate me from a honest relationship, not only with my Mom but also myself. Honest is honest big or small. How profound, lol. Relationships are tricky and full of expectations. If one isn’t careful dishonesty can become habit. It can block you from peace and serenity. Therefor in moving forward I can own it and fess up. Let it go say nothing knowing that next time I will choose to be more honest because what I know is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results ( such as no guilt) is insanity and if I want to live “Guilt Free” I have to change. Besides what am I going to say if she ask me what the “Dr.” had to say? Guess an honest response would be “not much”.
What truth will you dare to speak today and how will it move yo forward?
Ps. I think I’ll text my Mom and have her check out my blog lol